everything。 That’s where he crushed my father’s face and skull； that’s where he
killed him。 I brought him down here so the children wouldn’t see and so I
might have a chance to caution you。 After you three left； I also went out。
Father was home by himself。”
“I was not aware of that；” she said insolently。 “Where were you？”
I wanted her to take careful note of my silence。 Then I said； “I was with
Black。 I met with Black in the house of the Hanged Jew。 But you won’t breathe
a word of this to anyone。 Nor； for the time being； will you mention that my
father has been killed。”
“Who was it that murdered him？”
Was she truly such an idiot or was she trying to corner me？
“If I knew； I wouldn’t hide the fact that he was dead；” I said。 “I don’t know。
Do you？”
“How should I know anything？” she said。 “What are we going to do now？”
“You’re going to behave as if nothing whatsoever has happened；” I said。 I
felt the urge to wail； to burst out crying； but I restrained myself。 We both were
quiet。
200
Much later； I said； “Forget about the fish for now； set out the dishes for the
children。”
She objected and started to cry； and I put my arms around her。 We hugged
each other tightly。 I loved her then； momentarily pitying； not only myself and
the children； but all of us。 But even as we embraced； a worm of doubt was
anxiously gnawing at me。 You know where I was while my father was being
murdered。 To further my own designs； I’d cleared the house of Hayriye and the
children。 You know that leaving my father alone in the house was an
un